Can't tell the reasons,I did it for you
by StarsMaiden
Summary: Realizing what I had done, I turned around raising the shield again, but I was too late. I let out an anguished scream as I saw Edward and the others lifeless bodies being torn apart."Sorry,I'm terrible at summaries,so I just put a piece of the story.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters or anything else to do with Twilight... But what wouldn't I give to own the Cullen guys...*sigh*

**AN: This story starts in Breaking Dawn, after the Volturi had made their decision to attack or not. But there are a few changes I made to be able to write it. In this story, the Volturi did attack even after Alice appeared. And I added a new character, though he doesn't appear much. His name is Michael, and he came to Forks as one of the witnesses. He was the quiet type and he only really talked with Bella for reasons that will be explained in the story. Well... I think these are the only changes I made: The Volturi attacking and Michael. Oh, and I just wanted to say this is my first _real_ fanfic, so pleeeeaaasseee go easy on me, lol. Oh, and another thing... I'm writting this story in english (obviously), but this is not my first language, so forgive my bad grammar and, please, correct me if you think necessary.**

Prologue

It was chaos all around us. The Volturi charged viciously on us like a pack of hungry predators. I watched deep in horror as my family and friends fought to the death. I didn't know what to do; I couldn't help them fight afraid that the shield would break. I was stuck there watching as they tried to protect each other.

"Bella," Edward called urgently while he grabbed one of the Volturi guards from behind. "Renesmee!"

I caught the urgency and fear in his eyes and immediately looked back over my shoulders in the direction Jacob had run to save our daughter's life. They were still in the clearing; four vampires blocking their way out, crouching and baring their teeth.

Desperation took me as I ran to their side. Other's followed me protecting me from attacks I wasn't even aware of. I stopped beside Jacob and growled at the other vampires, pure anger making it sound more intimidating than it probably was.

I was just about to attack to protect my child when those vampires grinned at me maliciously and I heard a few screams of panic and horror coming from behind me. Sounds of vampires being torn apart immediately followed.

The shield had been broken.

Realizing what I had done, I turned around raising the shield again, but I was too late. I let out an anguished scream as I saw Edward and the others lifeless bodies being torn apart.

There was a loud blast and I felt as if my head had exploded. I saw everyone that was standing in the clearing fall to the ground. The next thing I knew, someone hit me from the left, and I fell on top of Jacob's human form and Renesmee; they had fallen on the ground beside me.

I was afraid to open my eyes knowing what I would see if I did. The image that was stuck in my mind was more devastating than anything I could possibly bear. I stayed on the ground motionless hoping that that was it, wishing that someone would kill me fast so I would stop feeling. I couldn't stand the pain and I just wanted it to be over. I wouldn't be able to continue living after this.

"Bella, listen to me," It was Michael's voice. For a fraction of a second I wished it was one of the Volturi that had come to destroy me, but then I immediately remembered why Michael was there.

I opened my eyes looking straight into his eyes and I begged desperately. "Please!"

"Can you do it?" He asked me emphatically.

I hesitated for half a second, but my answer was firm. "Yes."

"This is our last chance. Remember that!" Michael said.

Then all went black.


	2. Chapter One

Chapter One

Though I was hopeful, it was hard to believe Michael – our last shred of hope – could help. He said he had the ability to do it, but it was uncertain even for him. What if he couldn't do it?

Then I heard a sound that was like the crash of boulders in a rock slide – the sound of vampires crashing. For a fraction of a second I thought that the Volturi were attacking us again. I thought of Renesmee and immediately opened my eyes, scanning the area ready to stop anyone that dared to hurt my child. But they weren't there.

I looked up and saw Jasper slamming into Edward, who had his back towards me, trying to shove past him snapping his teeth and snarling.

Although I was informed about it before, I couldn't understand it immediately; one minute I was in a battle field watching my entire family being brutally murdered, and the next I was laying on the ground on top of broken pieces of glass in their living room. The family I just lost was now alive, standing there looking at me with shocked expressions. But my mind quickly caught up with everything.

Michael's power did work. He sent me back.

I was so glad, that I wanted to stand and hug them, but a sudden move of Emmett's stopped me. He grabbed Jasper from behind, locking him into his massive steel grip, but Jasper struggled on, his wild, empty eyes focused only on me.

I instantly remembered that day. One of the most terrible days of my life, but I couldn't think about it now. All I could think was that all the Cullens were there and they were safe.

Relief took over me for a moment, just before sadness did.

Yes, I was brought back… For a reason, a price – a price I wasn't sure I could pay. Just even considering it, made my heart twist and ache with an unbearable pain, and I wasn't sure if I could handle it.

"Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside" Carlisle's voice was quiet and authoritative.

Emmett nodded. "Come on, Jasper."

Jasper struggled against Emmett's unbreakable grasp, twisting around, reaching toward his brother with his bared teeth, his eyes still past reason.

Remorse took me and I wished I could do something to spare them of all of this. But suddenly I realized I could use this to make things easier. My heart twisted again, the pain intensified. I tried to control myself pushing the misery to the back of my mind.

I would do it. No matter how hard and painful it would be for me… It was worth it. For my family, for their safety, I would do anything.

Edward's face was white as bone as he wheeled to crouch over me, taking a clearly defensive position. A low warning growl slid from between his clenched teeth. I could tell that he wasn't breathing.

Rosalie, her divine face strangely smug, stepped in front of Jasper – keeping a careful distance from his teeth – and helped Emmett wrestle him through the glass door that Esme held open, one hand pressed over her mouth and nose.

Esme's heart-shaped face was ashamed. "I'm so sorry, Bella," she cried as she followed the others into the yard.

I watched them go, feeling extremely guilty. I still had the images of their deaths in my mind. My family still had died in front of me - because of me. I had failed protecting them and that was torturing me. I was back to stop that from happening again, and I would, no matter what. But the memories of the day the Volturi attacked would always torment me.

"Let me by, Edward," Carlisle murmured.

A second passed, and then Edward nodded slowly and relaxed his stance. Carlisle knelt beside me, leaning close to examine my arm. I wiped the tears I didn't even notice I was shedding, and tried to compose my features.

This was another thing I didn't understand at first; there were shards of glass piercing through my skin, blood pulsing out of my arm. I was human again. Michael never mentioned about the physics of his _time travelling_ ability, and I presumed we would return as we were in the future. But now I guessed we would become whatever we were in the time we came back to.

"Here, Carlisle," Alice said, handing him a towel.

He shook his head. "Too much glass in the wound." He reached over and ripped a long, thin scrap from the bottom of the white tablecloth. He twisted it around my arm above the elbow to form a tourniquet.

"Bella," Carlisle said softly. "Do you want me to drive you to the hospital, or would you…?"

"Do it here." I interrupted him.

"I'll get your bag," Alice said.

"Let's take her to the kitchen table," Carlisle said to Edward.

Edward lifted me, while Carlisle kept the pressure steady on my arm. It was strange being this weak again. But I guess I would have to get used to it again. Nothing would be as it was, because that future would be erased.

That thought brought something even more terrifying to my mind and I felt the shock mask my face. I was panicking. Renesmee! What about Renesmee? I would never be able to see her again. She wouldn't exist anymore. I wanted to cry in horror, but Carlisle's stopped me.

"How are you doing, Bella?"

"I-I'm not sure," I answered still thinking of my daughter, the daughter I would never hold again.

Alice was there. Carlisle's black bag was already on the table, a small but brilliant desk light plugged into the wall. Edward sat me gently into a chair, and Carlisle pulled up another. He went to work at once. I was beginning to feel a burning sensation intensifying in my arm, but I ignored it.

I was fighting back tears, but I was barely making it. I tried to focus again reminding myself of why I was brought back. I had to stick to the plan.

* * *

**AN: You guys may have noticed that a lot of this chapter has copied pieces of the book (New Moon). I just wanted to explain that the reason for this is just that the actions of the characters in this part of my fic were the same actions as the ones in the book. But it's just this part. Think of it as a Deja vu, lol.**


	3. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Edward stood over me, still protective, still not breathing. I tried remembering the details of that night. It wasn't so hard to remember, it was marked in my memories.

"Go, Edward," I said. Even though I wanted him to stay so I could enjoy as much as I could our last moments together.

"I can handle it," he insisted.

"Carlisle can fix me up without your help. Just go!" I said, little bit hard.

"I'll stay," he said.

"Go find Jasper. He needs your help more than I do." I said remembering Carlisle's words, and waited for him to support my suggestion.

"That's a good Idea," Carlisle said. "I'm sure Jasper's upset, and I doubt he'll listen to anyone but you right now."

I nodded in agreement.

"You might as well do something useful," Alice added.

Edward's eyes narrowed as we ganged up on him, but he nodded once and sprinted smoothly through the kitchen's back door.

A numb, dead feeling was spreading through my arm and I wished I could extend that numbness until it reached my chest. The pain there was greater than the one in my arm.

Alice also left the room, with an apologetic smile on her lips.

I was already beginning to miss her. Actually, I was already missing all of them. And the pain was so great I considered forgetting about everything and just telling them all the truth. But I couldn't. I started fighting back the tears again.

"It's not your fault, you know," Carlisle's voice was comforting.

"Yes, it is." I answered somberly.

"This could have happened to anyone".

I didn't answer. We were silent for a while.

"Carlisle," I started. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Everything. Everything your family went through because of me."

"Bella…"

"And for what I'm going to do. I don't know how much this will affect your family, but… I'm just trying to do what's best." The tears filled my eyes.

"What are you talking about?" He eyed me confused.

I shook my head dismissing the subject – and the tears – and stared at my arm. We were silent again until he finished bandaging my arm and cleaning things up. The burning was still intensifying and it was spreading up to my shoulder. I was beginning to think it strange. But I was distracted by other problems.

"Bella, don't let this… event upset you," He said. "This was an unfortunate accident. It doesn't change anything…"

"Oh, but it will." I answered looking down.

Carlisle looked at me worried. "It was quite a scare. But we would never let anything happen to you, Bella."

"I know," I answered and got up. "Thank you, Carlisle. For everything."

He noticed the farewell tone in my voice and stared at me, worry in his eyes. I knew what he was worried about.

"Do you want me to drive you home?" He asked.

"No. I'll wait for Edward."

Carlisle nodded and dropped his head. I left the kitchen and found Esme cleaning the mess I left on the floor.

"Let me do that, Esme." I said reaching for the mop in her hands.

"I'm almost done, dear." She answered with a smile. God, how I would miss her! "Oh, and you probably should change your shirt. Alice?"

"Got it!" Alice answered from somewhere upstairs, and I heard her coming down.

I looked down at my blood soaked shirt. I used to feel nauseated at the sight and smell of blood, but now I didn't feel anything. I guess I was already used to it, even though I'm back human. My body might have changed back, but my mind was still the same as before – before I came back I mean.

"C'mon," Alice was already by my side. "Let's find you something less macabre to wear."

Alice found me the same shirt she got me the first time. Esme's shirt that had almost the same color as the one I was using.

"Alice? Can I ask you something?" I whispered while I unbuttoned my shirt.

"Of course." She paused for a second. "What do you want me to tell Jasper?"

"Tell him I'm sorry. And tell him not to be so hard on himself. The important thing is that he's trying."

"I'll tell him."

"And If Edward asks to move to another place, don't let him. I'm sure you guys wouldn't like that. And I don't want to be a bother to your family any longer."

"What are you talking about, Bella?" She asked confused.

"You'll understand soon enough." I turned around, already dressed with the clean shirt, before Alice could ask any more questions. But before I opened the door I turned again and hugged her as tight as I could. My voice was as lower as I could manage. "I love you. All of you. Even Rosalie." I added with a short laugh. "And don't worry, you'll understand soon enough. Now go and find Jasper."

I opened the door and left a very confused Alice behind.

As I walked to the stairs I noticed that the burning sensation was all over my body now. I couldn't understand where it was coming from. Then I recognized it. It was a light version of it, but it was the same burning of the transformation.

I stopped at the top of the stairs. Was I becoming a vampire again? But I wasn't bitten or anything. It wasn't possible. Unless… Unless we did become in the past what we were in the future. Was that it? Was my body adjusting to my _future_ self?

This was all so confusing.

But if that was the case, I would have to act fast.


	4. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Edward was already there when I went back. His face was indecipherable; his eyes were strange, trying to hide something. But I've been down this tragedy road before. He had made his decision. The decision to leave me. The decision that took me to the darkest place inside a person's soul. But this time, I was expecting it. Actually, this time I made the same decision as him, but I would be the first to act on it. I would never let him leave me again. I would leave him, and spare his family from having to end their lives here before time.

They would be alright. The Volturi would never bother them again. They would continue as before, as if nothing happened. That was the reason I came back, the price I would have to pay. I would be miserable, but they would be fine. A small sacrifice in exchange for the safety of my entire family.

I would have to learn to deal with my pain.

"I'll take you home." Edward's voice was unemotional.

He opened the front door. I walked toward him wishing goodnight to Carlisle and Esme as I passed them. I tried not to let my feelings affect my smile and eyes, but the pain I was feeling was hard to control. I concentrated in the phrase I was forcing myself to chant: "It's for the best. They'll be safe now."

Edward opened the passenger's door of my truck for me, and I climbed in silently. There was a big red ribbon, struck to the new stereo Emmett had installed for me. I took it off remembering the day I ripped the radio off the dashboard, while Edward slid into the other side.

He didn't look at me once while he drove fast down the dark, serpentine lane. We were both silent, and I maintained it that way trying to bring up the courage to do what I had to. I knew I was only trying to delay myself, but I had to do it. And I didn't have much time before I turned - _if_ I was indeed turning. I forced myself to speak.

"Edward, stop the car."

"What for?"

"Stop the car, we need to talk."

"Can't it wait until we get to your place?"

"I don't want you to go there anymore." I was impressed at how my voice was steady as I said it, because inside I was screaming in pain and lament.

Confusion followed by pain momentarily flashed through Edward's eyes, but he composed himself and slowed the car down, pulling up in the side road. He was still quiet. I took a few deep breaths and started speaking again, feeling each word ripping my heart into tiny pieces. I kept my eyes down at the ribbon in my hands; I couldn't bear to look at him.

"You always warned me of the dangers I would put myself in if I stayed with you, but I didn't want to see it. All I wanted was to be with you. You always made me feel safe. But tonight I realized how real that danger is, and I got really scared. And I don't want to feel that scared ever again. I… I can't be with you anymore, Edward."

As soon as I stopped talking I opened my mouth to take it all back and tell him the truth. But I was able to stop myself – the fact that my voice got stuck in my throat with the tears helped.

Edward didn't move the whole time. He was like an ice statue always looking ahead. I kept my eyes down, afraid to look into his eyes. I didn't know if I could bear what I might've seen. I couldn't hear him breath.

"Bella, I'm sorry for everything I've put you through." His voice was steady but hoarse.

"Don't be. I don't regret it. There's just so much a person can take."

We were silent again. He began breathing again, deeply. I opened my door but he pulled me back in before I could touch the ground.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm driving. Get out of the car, Edward." I said trying to free myself.

"You can't drive! Let me take you home."

"No, I told you… I don't want you there anymore."

This time I was looking deep into his eyes and I saw the pain he was trying to hide and conquer. My heart was inexistent now, there was only pain. I turned back to the door and this time he didn't stop me.

I went around the car while he stepped out. I sat on the driver's seat and closed the door, never looking up, while he stood there staring.

"I'm sorry, Edward. Just… Forget all of this happened and everything will be alright."

I started the car and left before I would break down.


	5. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

I held back the tears for a few more miles in case Edward could hear. But even before I could let myself cry my eyes out, I had to stop the car again; another kind of pain hit me – and it hit hard and fast.

It was the pain of the transformation. The burning I was feeling suddenly grew to an unbearable intensity. I felt my body dying as the burning sensation violently took over, leaving me incapacitated, trembling and contorting stretched in the car seat. I could feel the venom running down my body until it reached my heart. I could hear my heartbeat fastening wildly in its last moment of beating.

And then, as suddenly as it hit, the pain was gone. And I was changed. It lasted only a minute. My theory was probably right – we did come back the same way we were in the future. I changed _back _to what I was a few hours ago in that field. I was me again. Well, the _me_ as I remembered.

Then I froze. I couldn't go back to Charlie's house. He would see I changed. Where would I go? I couldn't go to Jacksonville as I planned. I definitely couldn't stay; the Cullens would notice my change too.

That reminded me that I was only a few miles away from them. I quickly rolled up the windows so my scent wouldn't spread, and started moving again. But where would I go?

If I didn't go back to Charlie's house, he would call the Cullens asking about me, and they would start searching. That could not happen! I would have to find a way to get back, letting Charlie know I was back, but not letting him see me.

I drove to Charlie's house and parked in the same spot I used to. I wished I had taken a jacket or something with a hood to hide my face, but I had to settle with my hair. I brushed it with my fingers pulling it over my shoulders so I could make a curtain out of it.

I was still brushing it when I heard a noise coming from the right side of the house, near of where I was. I stiffened for a moment hearing it move. When I realized it was coming toward me I ducked murmuring "Shit, shit, shit!", and hiding my face. The windows were still closed so I couldn't smell who it was. It was probably Edward making sure I got home safely, and he must have seen me right now.

But then I thought; if Edward was following me home, he would have shown up when I stopped the second time. He would have heard my heart dying and would probably be interested in knowing what the hell was going on. Then, who was sneaking around my father's house?

I heard a knock in the passenger's window, and the door opened.

The scent I smelled when the wind blew in seemed the most wonderful smell in the universe. I immediately looked up almost screaming with happiness and relief.

It was the scent of Renesmee and Jacob.

* * *

**AN: This is a short one...Sorry...It was suposed to be better...not just this chapter but all of them...But everytime I tried to make it better I changed my mind about something and I had to rewrite everything...So, since I already had a lot of this "version" written I just decided to stop trying to improve it...or else I would never finish it lol...**

**But I hope it's not so bad...Let me know what you think =)**


	6. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

"Renesmee!" I almost yelled, anxiously reaching for the little girl in Jacob's arms. She jumped toward me as Jacob sat beside us and closed the door. I hugged her as tight as I could without hurting her. "Are you okay? Are your hurt? Is everything alright?"

"I'm fine, momma." She said. Her clear voice was one of the most beautiful sounds I heard in my entire life.

"Oh, God! I thought I lost you!" My voice was breaking with unshed tears. "I love you!"

"Bella, what the hell is going on?" Jacob asked, his face confused. "One minute we're being attacked by Italian bloodsuckers and the next we were down at my garage inside my unfinished rabbit, which I clearly remember finishing."

"It was Michael. He sent us back."

"Back? Back where?"

I shushed him while I heard Charlie move towards the window in the living room.

"Get down!" I said lying Renesmee in my lap. I pretended to be turning of the radio while Charlie peeked. Then he went back to the sofa. "Bring Renesmee upstairs. We'll talk there."

I kissed my daughter in the forehead and went out of the car. Now was the hard part. I fixed my hair to cover my face and entered the house.

"Hey, dad, I'm back!" I said forcing my voice to look more like my _human_ voice. I spoke fast so he wouldn't feel much difference, and so he wouldn't be able to respond. "The party was great. Cake, balloons, everything. They gave me a new radio for my truck. I'm so tired. I'm going straight for bed. Goodnight!"

I was already upstairs, staging a fake loud yawn, when Charlie answered.

"Uh, okay. Goodnight, Bells!"

Jacob was still entering my room when I opened the door. I ran to him and took Renesmee off his back and sat her on the bed kneeling in front of her so I could take a good look.

"Are you really okay?"

She nodded and touched my face with her little hand. She showed me the face of each one of her family, asking where they were.

"They're fine. They're at home."

She asked to go back there. I sighed.

"We can't, sweetie." I took a deep breath and looked deep into her eyes. "I'm afraid we won't be able to see them ever again."

Her eyes widened and she asked out loud.

"Why?!"

"Do you remember that day Michael went hunting with us?" She nodded. "Do you remember what he and I talked about?" She showed me her memory of that conversation. "Yes, well. He did it. Michael sent us back so we could stop the Volturi from attacking."

"He could do that?" Jacob asked surprised. He sat on the other side of the bed. "Why didn't he use it before, then? Before the Volturi came, before all those people…" He didn't finish the sentence, his eyes lost in some memory. I was remembering the same thing.

"He didn't know what would happen. He hoped he wouldn't have to use his ability. He was killed by it." I answered thanking Michael and wishing he was at peace, wherever he was.

"Killed?"

"That's why he hoped he wouldn't have to use it. It took him a great amount of effort to send us back. It consumed him." I answered what Michael told me once.

"So… we can't go back?"

"No. This is our present now." I sighed.

"_When_ are we, exactly?"

"It's my eighteenth birthday… Before the Cullens left." I looked down trying to hold back the pain that I had momentarily ignored.

"This far back?"

"Yes."

"What a trip it must've been for _them_. Seeing you like that." Jacob pointed at my face – my red eyes.

"They don't know," I looked at Renesmee. "And that's why we can't see them again. They cannot find out what happened to us, where, or _when_, we came from. They don't remember anything, and it must stay like that for their own safety."

Renesmee started crying silently and it ached to see my daughter like that, but there was nothing I could do.

"I'm sorry, honey! But it's for their best. Don't you want what is best for them? Besides we still have each other. I will always be here." I hugged her trying to comfort her.

"Me too." Jacob added rubbing her back. After a while he asked. "What do we do now?"

"We have to leave." I answered whipping the tears from Nessie's face. "Where's her bag?"

"There," Jacob pointed to the floor under the window.

I reached for it and checked the contents to see if everything was there. It was; the money, the fake documents for Jake and Renesmee, and everything. That would make things easier.

"Where are we going?" Jacob asked as he watched me pick my own bag off the floor dropping the books on the bed and starting to pack a few clothes.

"First we head for Seattle." I answered trying to think of a next move.

"And after that?"

"I'm not sure. We'll see when we get there."

"That's not a very good plan."

"It's good for now. We just have to leave first, before anyone suspects anything. We'll have time to plan better once we leave this place."

I froze. Charlie was coming up the stairs.

"Hide!" I whispered while throwing my bag behind the rocking chair, turning of the lights and slipping under the covers of my bed with Renesmee, shielding her form from sight with my body. Jacob threw himself on the floor beside my bed, pulling his knees up so I wouldn't be visible. We all hold our breaths.

The door opened quietly and we waited. So did Charlie. Usually he would just peek and leave, but now he was taking his time. I wondered if he was noticing anything unusual, but then I noticed what he might've thought strange.

I exhaled and breathed heavily as a normal person would if she's asleep. After the third breathing, Charlie left. I only moved after I heard his bedroom door closing.

"Dang!" I hissed.

"What?!" Jacob asked alarmed.

"We can't leave right now. Charlie would notice the truck isn't there."

"Bella, are you sure we can't tell the Cullens? They could help us."

"No!" I hissed angrily but quietly. "I can't put them in any danger, Jake. I've ruined their lives enough already."

"Won't Edward find it strange that you simply disappeared overnight?"

"He'll think I left… To live with my mother," and I added thinking. "I'll have to buy a ticket to Florida so they wouldn't be suspicious."

"That guy would follow you to the end of the earth just to be with you. What makes you think he won't follow you to Florida?"

I got up and crossed the room to get my bag from behind the chair while I answered. "I broke up with him."

"You broke up with him?" Jacob asked laughingly, but he was serious again when he saw my face. "Bella, you broke up with him?" I didn't answer. "You're really serious about leaving them?"

Renesmee sniffed still silently crying and Jacob held her in his arms comforting her. I watched her cry and wished there was another way, but this was the only way.

"Don't you think he has the right to know he has a child?" Jacob insisted.

"Jake… He doesn't even know we are married."

"I'm just saying it would be easier for us if they knew."

"It would be _dangerous_ for them if they knew. Please, Jake. Drop it."

He sighed shaking his head in disapproval. "Fine."

After I checked if I packed everything I needed I lay on the bed and offered my arms to Renesmee. She climbed down from Jake's arms and accommodated herself at my side.

"Are you tired?" I asked her. She nodded and showed me an image of Edward singing my lullaby while putting her to sleep. "Hold that thought." I whispered to her and sang along with Edward, his image in our minds.


	7. Chapter Six

Chapter Six

After a while –at my order –Jacob sat on the chair and tried to sleep, but it was too small and uncomfortable for him, so he laid down on the floor next to chair.

I spent the night trying to focus on Renesmee breathing and Jacob's snoring so I wouldn't give in to the urge of running to the Cullens house and telling them everything.

It was a relief when the daylight broke through my window. But the relief soon became anxiety as the time to run grew closer. I woke Jacob the moment I heard Charlie move in his bed; fearing he would notice the powerful snore coming from my room. And we waited while Charlie got ready for work.

As soon as Charlie was out the door we were moving. I told Jacob to find something for him to wear in Charlie's room and went downstairs with Renesmee in one arm and my bag in the other. I took the note I had written to Charlie during the night from my pocket and left it on the fridge. It was a pretty vague note, but it was enough to convince him no to call the FBI or something on me. I quickly fried all the eggs and bacon I could find and made Renesmee eat some. She didn't like the taste, but hunting was out of the question – that was something I would really have to worry about, but I was going to think about it later.

I put on the coat with the biggest hood I had and yelled to Jacob to hurry up. Charlie's clothes were small for him, but he managed to find something. He shoved the food down his throat and we hurried to the car. A few seconds later we were on the road.

I was praying the whole time not to pass by a silver Volvo. But luck, it seemed, was at our side - that's a first. As soon as we were off the city I stepped on it forcing my poor old truck's engine. We had to be fast.

It took us a little bit more than an hour to get to Port Angeles. I was seriously considering stealing a faster car, but Charlie would find out if I abandoned the truck, and would look for me. I had to stick to it for the whole trip. We stopped there for a little while because Jacob had already tore Charlie's jacket. I gave him some money to go buy clothes that actually fitted and waited in the car with Renesmee.

"Are you hungry? Do you need anything?" I asked her. She shook her head. She still looked sad, but resigned.

"I got you this," Jacob handed me a small rectangular box when he came back after a while. I opened it and there was a pair of black sunglasses inside. "Thought you might need it. You know…" He gestured at my eyes.

"Good thinking!" I said putting them on.

We also stopped at the next gas station to fill the tank so we wouldn't have to stop again so soon.

I was growing really impatient with my truck. It was really slowing us down. We had to stop a few more times to fill the tank, and that made us loose the ferry. We had to wait almost an hour for it. But after _long_ hours of travelling we finally got to the Sea-Tac Airport, and I parked on the fourth floor of the garage.

"You two stay here while I go inside to buy the ticket. I won't take long." I said.

"You've decided where we're going?"

"No. But I decided we're not going by airplane. I'll trade cars here and we'll go north from here."

"Why can't we go by air?"

"Because they would find out. Not all of us have fake ids. I'm just buying one to Florida as a cover up. I'll go in buy the ticket, check in and then we're off, okay?"

"Bella…"

"Okay?" I pressed. I knew what he was going to say.

"Fine," He sighed.

I kissed Renesmee in the forehead and got off the car. I got my bag and started walking toward the skybridge that connected the parking lot with the main terminal.

I was just a few yards away when I saw him.


	8. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

Jasper was standing just outside the bridge looking around – looking for someone. What the hell was he doing here?! Were the others here too? He was just about to look my way, when a van passed in front of me, blocking his view. I took the moment to crouch and hide behind the car next to me. I peeked quickly to see if he had spotted me, but he was still looking around. I cursed mutely and started crawling my way back to my truck. But now I was afraid he would listen to its loud engine – it was a miracle he didn't heard us coming –, and what if he saw it – or us? I cursed again.

And once again luck was with us. There was a couple, two cars away, getting their bags from the trunk, and they left the driver's door open. I could see the keys inside. A really small part of my brain fought the idea of stealing it, but I definitely could not drive my truck anymore. And I had already stolen a car once with Alice – I was already a criminal. I moved silently and very quickly into the driver's seat. None of the owners noticed me. I quietly shut the door and waited for them to close the trunk.

As soon as they did, I started the car and hit the gas. The car accelerated noisily and I ran toward the eastern end of the garage, where Jacob and Renesmee were. I could hear the owners screaming at me and at the others – for help in that case – while I hit the brakes abruptly next to the passenger's door of my truck.

"Hurry up and get in!" I screamed at him, opening the other door.

Jacob was looking at me surprised and incredulous. "What the hell are you doing?"

"They're here," I whispered urgently.

The next second Jacob was getting off the truck with Renesmee in his arms, walking around the stolen car to sit on the other side. He placed Renesmee in the back seat, before I heard him curse and sit next to me.

"Shit, I think he saw me," He said.

I didn't answer. Jasper didn't know Jacob, but Edward did. He would see him in Jasper's thoughts. All I could think was "Run, run, run!"

After running over a few obstacles, we were out of the airport. We were running so fast I was afraid to look away from the road ahead.

"Are they following us?" I asked. Jacob was looking through the back window.

"I don't know."

"Are there any Volvos, Mercedes, any fancy car?"

"Not yet."

But I couldn't feel relief yet. What was Jasper doing here? Did they know I was leaving? How could they? Alice wouldn't see me because of Jacob and Renesmee. Even if they did, why would they come here? I had already broken up with Edward; they wouldn't have any reason to follow me.

"This can't be happening!" I murmured.

I drove like a maniac, but I managed to get out of town without causing any accident. I wasn't sure what to do now. I couldn't go back to the airport, and if I didn't Charlie would find out I never left and would freak out. My face would be known by every police station in the state, and – if he didn't find me soon – the country.

"Where are we going now?" Jacob asked when we stopped at a gas station to fill the car's tank. I also bought a Washington state map so I could plan.

"North," I answered tracing a line in the map.

We were already headed north on the I-5. But after a while I decided it would be wiser to stay away from that road, since I was driving a stolen car. So I took US-2 in Everett and then WA-9 heading north again.

I drove for a little more than an hour. We stopped at a small town named Sumas which was near the Canadian border. I was planning to cross it at night by foot. I didn't want Charlie to find out I was leaving the country.

It was a cloudy day in Sumas, so I stopped in a restaurant so Jacob and Renesmee could eat something.

"Renesmee, please eat something," I begged her when she refused to eat the smashed potato and beef I was offering her. I added in a whisper. "I know you don't like human food, but we won't be able to hunt for now."

"I want to go home." She whimpered.

I sighed putting the fork back in her plate. I really hated seeing her like this. It made everything even harder.

I took her from the chair she was sitting and put her in my lap comforting her as she laid her head in my shoulder.

"Are you sure this is the right thing to do?" Jacob asked looking pained by Renesmee's doleful expression.

"How many times will I have to repeat myself? I'm going to say this one last time, and I need you both to understand it once and for all." I answered quietly. Renesme raised her head and they both looked at me attentively. "Yesterday, I saw... Yesterday, my family died right before my eyes. They were brutally murdered. And it was my fault. They died because of me. I failed to protect them..."

"Bella, you couldn't -"

"I could've helped. We would still have a chance to fight, or run, as long as I kept the shield up. But I failed and they died. They _died_, Jacob. Do you have any idea how unbelievably devastating that is to me? The only thing that is keeping me together is that I still have Renesmee and the fact that I know they are alive again. Michael died so we could have a chance, an only chance, to stop it from happening again. As much as I want to be with them, as much as I want to run back to them, I cannot. I _will_ not! The important thing is that they are alive and well. _We_ are alive and well. I can't put them in danger again. I will not risk the only chance we have to stop what happened yesterday from happening again. Can you, please, understand and accept that?"

They stared at my mournful expression for a moment, then Jacob nodded and went back to his plate. He ate the rest of his food without appetite. Renesmee looked at me for a little longer, then inclined over the table to get her plate. I smiled at her appreciatively and offered her a bite of the beef.


End file.
